I'm going to be very transparent in this post, just as I hope to do on my whole blog, and in my life. I am ridiculously prone to fear, worry, anxiety, doubt, all of that messy terrible stuff.
I went through abuse as a kid and got diagnosed with some major PTSD, and i've gone through phases in the past where I was too scared to even go out my front door. Big changes send me into a whirlwind of doubt and anxiety, and this has been a battle of mine for over 10 years.
We all know perfect love casts out fear, and I believe in and have accepted God's perfect love, and I do on a daily basis. But for some people, that just doesn't take all their cares and worries away instantly.
Because I have PTSD I go through phases of anxiety. Some days, weeks, months, are awesome. Some, are the opposite. My biggest fear is the unkown. I make a million possible situations in my head, most of them scary ones, and when the time comes for me to move in a area in my life, I over analyze and freak out.
But recently, I had a breakthrough, a realization that has given me the most peace i've ever had. Something that's deepened my trust and relationship with God alot. And it all relates to this verse in Dueteronomy 31, verse 8;
"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
Whenever I get in a bad place in my life, whenever things start looking grim, when I'm afraid, I pray for God to go ahead of me in a situation. And in my mind, it's like ok well now I sent God ahead so he should help me through this. How ridiculous. God is years and years ahead of me. He's not surprised by anything that happens, and THEN decides to start working in my life and heart. He's already handled every single thing long before you even knew you needed him. He goes before you. He paves a way, he defeats obstacles, he leaves some ones but strengthens you in the process so when you arrive to that place he's prepared you to go through it. And he's not always just in the future, he's present too. That's something I fail at, worrying about the future and missing my present. He never leaves. Why am I being discouraged by circumstances that are just old news and done business to my King? So recently just by realizing and accepting this truth, whenever I get anxious of a future circumstance, I just remind myself that God's already been through that and has it all taken care of. And no matter how bad or good things go, he's more than prepared and supplies me with all I need to make it through any change, season, or obstacle. I hope this blog can give you peace through whatever circumstance you're walking through, that you would know that the Lord has already gone before you, and he will not forsake you.
